What a Foul Up: FIFA – The Movie

It’s been announced that Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are planning to make a film based on the current FIFA bribery scandals. One hopes they make a comedy as that’s the appropriate genre that best portray the FIFA capers .

If I had access to Jack Warner’s numerous bank accounts I would opt for Britain’s Armondo Iannucci to make such a film. Iannucci has been the man behind comedy classics like “In the Loop”, “The Thick of It” “Veep” and “Alan Partridge”.

As for the cast members

  1. FIFA boss Sepp Blatter would be perfect for an actor such as Danny Devito. But Simon McBurney (Archdeacon in “Rev”) or Denmark’s Kim Bodnia (“The Bridge”) are suitable candidates.
  2. Jack Warner – former CONCACAF chief & John Oliver’s biggest fan- could be an ideal role for someone like Delroy Lindo. Samuel L Jackson would add something to Warner’s character. There is also the wonderful Rudolph Walker.
  3. Wil Johnson and Karl Collins could play Warner’s sons Daryll & Daryan.
  4. Wendell “Bunk” Pierce or Chi McBride could play the US based Cayman born Jeffrey Webb – another former FIFA big wig awaiting extradition from Switzerland to the US.
  5. The Qatari players in the World Cup winning bid could be played by the likes of Omid Djalili, Nasser Memarzia, Riz Ahmed..
  6. Chuck Blazer – the man with the wire and feline penthouse- could be played by John Goodman or Delaney Williams.

Given all the protagonists caught in FIFA sting are so far men the female characters for such a film are limited unless you stretch poetic license. But the role of US Attorney General Loretta Lynch is made for Marie Jean-Baptiste (Without Trace).

The other female supporting character could be Trinidad’s & Tobago’s Prime Minister the colourful Kamla Persad-Bissessar. She has had a love, hate, just-go-Jack relationship with her former political ally Warner. These days Warner is dead set on a revengeful quest to bring the PM down with his revelations.

Let’s hope the Affleck/Damon duo produce an entertaining film. Let comedy win over the 90 minutes.

Simon McBurney as Sepp?

Simon McBurney as Sepp?

Kim Bodnia as Blatter?

Kim Bodnia as Blatter?

download (1)

Lindo as Jack Warner?


Goodman as Blazer?

About africanherbsman1967

Funking all over the globe
This entry was posted in Ben Affleck, Comedy, FIFA, Film, Film making, Films, Hollywood, Jack warner, Matt Damon, Sepp blatter and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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